Chapter 15

                           

                                   On the Rocks...

        It was past 7 in the evening when Arnav entered home. He could sense her presence. He was sure. Only recently he had started being habitual to his senses which used to react erotically whenever she was near and now his  bloody dumb organ had picked a new habit of drumming some stupid sound like Dhak..Dhak..Dhak...! He even thought once to send a memo to 'who may it concern' for creating such useless thing in human body.

       

         Om Prakash came and took hold of his briefcase while Hari Prakash was devoted to look at Laxmiji. Arnav had been noticing that HP had started avoiding coming face to face with him from few days.He simply shrugged at that and asked OP directly,

  

  "Where is Khushi?"

   "On terrace?"  OP replied with a surprised tone.

      

  

           Arnav climbed staircase skipping two steps at a time and went to terrace almost running. He was just thinking over some new strategy to convince Khushi for the proposal when stood rooted to the ground , dumbfounded at terrace door by the scene unfolding before him.

           NK had knelt down over the ground holding a ring into one hand and beautiful long fingers of a girl into another. He asked,

 "So the lady, may I have this honor to ask you , would you like to marry me?"

  

   Master of those beautiful fingers picked the ring up from his hand and cupping her face into  palms due to shyness nodded positively.

  

  "No Khushiji, not like that..Apako  marjani bolana padega (You need to say dying ) "

  

  "Marjaani...??"

 "Yes yes..boliye Marjaani boliye..."

  

Khusi giggled at his Hinglish and corrected him.. "Offo..marjani nahi Nanheji, mooh jubani ,mooh  jubani bolana padega(Not dying, it's  verbally)"

 "Yes yes, that is it..apko wahi karana hoga.." He demanded sheepishly.

   

     And then Arnav heard that one word..those three letters  on which his life was felt dependent ,were granted to that b*****d  NK.

                                      

                                             "Y..E..S"

     

                 He left stunned by her response. His mind  blacked out for few seconds before he could register her word and deduce meaning of it slowly. Once the realization hit him, his claws clenched in fists with anger which knew no bound now. He only could call her name through his clinched jaw with hard attempt , trembling with rage..

                                               "Khushi..."

   

            That thunderous sound startled both Khushi and NK. And his sudden presence panicked them. They could see the  tarrying storm in those eyes. Nk tried to hid behind Khushi avoiding Arnav's gaze.

  

Arnav strode closer to them and staring Khushi with vigorous disbelief ordered NK,   "NK leave..."

     

Sweat droplets gathered at NK's  forehead. How could he leave Khushiji alone to be ASR's prey?

  "Let's leave , Khushiji" He could only speak this with all energy drowned.

  Without moving his gaze for a moment Arnav roared ,"NK leave, before I do something  so uncontrollable."

  

              NK left hastily giving an apologetic look to Khushi.

     Khushi took a step towards door when suddenly those strong arms grabbed her and flushed to his chest...the place where his heart rested..

  

   "How many times have I warned you not to move away when I am talking to you."

  Khushi looked into those caramel eyes. He looked so vulnerable. She had experienced many tempers of him until now but this was something different. It was not even temper. She could see frustration, irritation..and...fear of losing something valuable there.

  

  

    As she continued perceiving him, his face caught coldness of a stone.  Pushing her away from himself  abruptly ,he howled "How dare you Khushi?  How dare you to say 'NO' to me and  'YES' to that damn fool NK?"

 "I didn't say 'NO' to you, Arnavaji." Khushi replied in a calmed voice.

   

 "But you said 'Yes' to him, didn't you?"

   

  "No,I didn't say 'Yes' either to Nanheji."

   

   Arnav lost his remaining control at her answer. He grabbed her forearms hearing the denial. Khushi winced as his nails digging into her  fragile skin caused pain.

  He warned,"Don't try  to speak  even a single lie, Khushi. I have witnessed you double gaming me."

  

 Khushi hurt by that. How could he? Was he accusing her for deceiving  him? He could  believe his eyes but not her ? How could he not trust her? Is it even  possible for her to think of betraying him ever?

   She tried to explain him,

   "Arnavji ,ap ne jo dekha wo wesa nahi hai jese ki aap samajh rahe hai. (Whatever you have witnessed is not what you are considering) Once listen to me..Let me explain you.."

   

         But where was  Arnav there to listen to her pleas ? He was imprisoned  behind pitiless, frigid walls of solitary at that exact instant when he heard her uttering those letters to someone else.Now stood there ,the ruthless ASR ... With hurt ego... drown in madness like a wounded beast..ready to clapper claw to the one who is assailant. His eyes filled with burning flames of  anguish. He could not tolerate his bruises anymore..And there would not be any need of a psychic to forecast what happens when marred ASR scathes.

     

     He dug his nails into her skin further more and ignoring her pursed lips to avoid grimacing due to the pain ,blew out,

    " Do not..! Don't you dare Khushi  Kumari Gupta..Now it's of no use. Your plan has brutally failed, though you did a commendable job. I was almost fallen for your traps." 

  

   He  paused to gauge her reaction...But  continued  further when she did not seem to react to his words , " It was my mistake to give you this much of importance. I should have understood earlier... I should have known better. ... What else I can expect  from a middle class gold digger girl like you? It's pretty clear now. What an irony!"  He smirked with disguise. "Here I was willingly providing you all the riches you ought and there you were making mint from someone else considering him as a jackpot? What a pity!"

   

       Khushi stood glued to the floor by all that stoop low allegations. How dared he? How can he think so low of her? Khushi was the girl who could easily sacrifice everything for others' happiness excluding only one thing and that quality of her had provided a subtle strength to her character .It was her held high self respect which she would never let fall down for anything.or for anyone in that matter..He can't always come and ram it for not any so good reason..So she riposted him.retaliated with all her mighty being  but failed to match his atrocious  blames.

     

"Ohh ..so now it's me who was chancing on someone else but what about your failure? I had told you to come up with some attractive term which would convince me for your so called proposal... but you could not. You failed to do that. Why don't you accept that instead of blaming me?"

   "But you had even told me to take my own time and I haven't used my whole time yet." He spoke highly surprised to see her not defending  herself.

   "There was no any clause saying that I can't seek any other proposal until you come up with some lucrative term for me, was there?"

  His nostrils flared at her audacity. He asked in so hoarse voice,

  "Ohh... This is it? So what kind of so lucrative thing that dumb NK has offered you  which Arnav Sigh Raizada could not? I never knew that you had such  a good calculative brain of yours, Khushi. Really ,such a back-stabber you are!"

  

     And that was it. It was enough for  Khushi  to lose all her control which she had tried to gain with her every breathe  from last few minutes. She let go of her attempts to understand him. Let go the hope that he would ever understand her.

 She shoved him back with all her strength. He could see the green marks  left over her forearms.

 "Stop it somewhere Arnvaji, will you?

         

          What do  you think of yourself and what you think of me? How could you degrade me like this? It is just because I did not agree to your proposal, isn't it? It is your so fat hurt ego speaking  because it can't tolerate that a  middle class girl does not fall for The Arnav Singh Raizada. 

         

                What am I for you? just a mere project ? An interesting deal which  you want to grab either by hook or crook, isn't it? It doesn't occur  to you if this interesting deal of yours is a human being too who can have her own feelings. Have you ever thought  once what do I want? Whether I am happy to marry you or not? Even once? No..it doesn't matter to you because it's not profitable for you to think about my happiness, am I right? Or maybe  because you don't find me of that standard . Is it so , Arnavaji?" She stopped to grab some air for her exhausted lungs after her heavy outburst.

   "Khushi listen.."

 She held  her palm open in front of his face warning in so cold voice,

   "Don't you dare to intervene when I am talking to you!

      

        You want my answer to your said proposal or deal or project or whatever you call in that your business language, don't you? So here it is. I deny to  accept that proposal. I deny it not because I have chanced something else but because I don't find your deal beneficial for me in any way. I don't know what kind of profits you ought from me in this but the only profit I was seeking was ..that..your...your heart , Arnavji!"Tears were rolling down from her beautiful eyes being unable to handle that emotional tornado anymore.

  "I swear by my Devi Maiyya Arnavji, I never expected anything else from you. Not a single penny of yours  ever lured me. It was always only you...But I was wrong. I made a mistake to  think that Arnav Sigh Raizada can have a heart too. I was fool to expect you to change..to understand what the emotions are..to experience the magical world of Love. I was such a big damn stupid." Her beautiful eyes felt incompetent  to depict intensity of the pain jabbing her heart at that instant, no matter how many tears were frittered away.

  " But now I have understood, you can never offer me the only thing I ever expected from you and if you speak of offering your wealth  then I was never  even remotely interested  in that  riches. So now I say 'NO' to you because  Khushi kumara Gupta  can never marry to a heartless man like Arnav Singh Raizada. Sorry, Arnavaji!"

              

         

    

         Befuddled Arnav stood there staring at her running back. His brain just could not deduce what she said.  He was baffled enough to understand whatever happened in last few minutes of span. Did she  really deceive him? Or was he imagining everything? Did she say 'NO' to him? That means will she leave him forever to be alone ? Would not he ever able see that beautiful,  smile adorned  face again..?  Her those crazy antics which always ended up making him smile..? Her overdramatic histrionics which had filled his life with different colors ?  Would he ever able listen again those magical beats of her heart which always reminded  him of his own?  With his every dreading thought, the newly found rhythmic sound of his heart was slowly conking...Dhak..Dhak ..Dha..Dh..D..!

        

    

       Suddenly he felt short of air. It was like someone had snatched the very earth below his feet. An abyssal vacuum  was created in his heart which left him feeling dizzy.Did she just say 'No' to him?  'No'? It was only few days before when he had found something worthy of living and ...now suddenly that all lost.What is need to live this lonely life now? She has left him...Left him alone like his mom did 14 years ago. He sank on his knees.

         

     

      

   The sky was covered by the black evil clouds hiding those shining stars       behind them. He could not see the bright star there, he was looking for.

                

                  "Why  Ma? Why it always happens to me?"

   

        He surrendered himself to that cold, lifeless floor of the terrace...

                                                                                  

Chapter 14

                                 
                                         Close to HOME

           

            It was not only Khushi who was hopelessly irritated with Arnav's regular attempts to impress her with his professional tactics but even Shyam was so frustrated with his Sale sahab! No matter how many brilliant ideas he had provided him which were competent enough to win over Khushi Kumari Gupta's naive heart; but Arnav would always end up upsetting her more. Even the plan of visiting Lucknow was flop.When he joined them on second day at Lucknow, Arnav had surprisingly crept into his shell again.He had refused to join family picnic and even stayed aloof at the moments they all spent together. Shyam tried to know the reason behind his withdrawal but could not have gathered much.

                 Poor fellow, only if he could know what had his Sale sahib 

                          been through, the night  before his arrival.

flashback

         Arnav continued to draw his legs towards parking place drown in melancholy unknown to the outer world.The whole evening had been an emotional roller costar ride for  him.He was overwhelmed by the different feelings peeping in heart and then slowly securing places in his mind one by one. He was envy of NK for effortlessly making HIS Khushi laugh in her own tinkling sweet sound which he could never do, angry at Di as she could think of NK as a potential life-partner for Khushi plainly ignoring him to consider  for that  place, vehement for whatever had happened few minutes back.He had never experienced such vivid expressions together in his history of 14 years. What was the sudden change? Was he losing control over his own  mind? Was some kind of weakness enveloping his whole existence? Shall he forfeit his  every belonging again like that dreadful day in past? What  if something like that happens again? He would not  able to stand up this time like earlier .He would shatter into pieces if he was put to bear the pain again.Who will hold on to him then ?''  And at that instant he felt a tug at his hand bringing him out of his musings.He turned to find the source and saw Khushi holding his hand indicating he was crossing over his parking place.

      

          He looked at her.She was radiating with some serenely promising aura. Her soft hazel eyes were reflecting a smoothing assurance .She was his only hope if anything bad happens again.Only she could make him stand up on his feet if he falls. She was his alone strength. Suddenly he grabbed her in a tight embrace as if his life depended on it.A cool zephyr passed through his every nerve as he experienced her warm touch. His over beating heart composed remarkably achieving its own normal pace again when he heard her heartbeats echoing  in that quite place.Dhak Dhak Dhak Dhak...! And eventually his body relaxed with tranquility. His senses could no more hold back with all the longing he felt at the moment as they were drenched in a strong desire instantly making him aware of their close proximity. His grip loosened unknowingly with overcoming desire, that scared him too .

          

                 

             Khushi instantly took a step back as his grip loosened. She was confused about what has took over him suddenly. Her another step to increase the distance made her back rest at the door of his car. She peeked into his eyes hesitantly ..those  normally chocolaty orbs were darkened by desire n overpowering passion now.A shiver ran through her spine making her dizzy. She gulped watching those burning flames of yearning in his eyes, suddenly turning the cool breeze around them into a hurricane that would blow her away. She had never felt these kind of jitters before which would make her knee melt. It is another thing to blow a whistle when Salman Khanji  makes romance with his heroines in his movies but to stand up in front of a lasciviously boiling volcano which happens to be your love too and not to mention the bounteous looks of the man adding more flames ,must be something what people call as chutzpah.And before she could seek any support to restrain herself from sinking to the ground , his hands rested at her   sides providing her most aspired buttress. She clenched her dupatta tightly to control her quivering hands but could not do anything with her trembling lips when she saw him leaning down and closed her eyes in anticipation '..

    

             Arnav ran his tongue around his dry lips n bent down in anticipation to wet his equally dry throat, his entire attention was held by those plump ,luscious shivering lips.He felt he would die with thirst if he immediately dint drink that life giving sweet potion. He leaned down,counting every nanosecond needed to cover remaining distance between them. His mind went numb anticipating the heavenly feel of touching those lips when something blocked his path of serenity. He looked irritatingly at whatever had stopped  him and found two delicate palms resting at his chest. Khushi was shoving him back with whatever strength had left in her fuddled state. He looked at her confused, meaning to ask 'What?'

  

  

         "Ye galat hai , Arnavji'"(This is wrong,Arnavji..)She spoke  groggily.

   

        "Kya?"(what?) Arnav asked chafed.

        She just glanced at his eager lips.

     "Khushi, we soon would be getting married.." He spoke as a matter of fact to end that unnecessary delay.

         Her eyes filled with accusations. She spoke  in warning tone, "I haven't  yet  said  'Yes' to you Arnavji..! And besides that, it's not about getting married or not. It's about my morals. How can I let someone do...do..th..This to me...without even knowing he loves me or not???" She looked at him expectantly. His eyes gleamed with some unspoken emotions.  Khushi  predicted what would be coming from his mouth if he let it speak now. She hopefully gathered all her strength to hear those words she would die for.

        

     His eyes got softer for a second or more and... suddenly putting up their usual guarded expressions, he opened his mouth with immense control over his fury just to say "It's late.You wait here. I'll bring Di"  

He removed  his hands freeing her from their secured room and went leaving utterly disappointed Khushi behind.

                              

                                                  ------------

                          Shyam was getting ready to leave for his Court standing  in front of the mirror, lost his mind in thoughts about Arnav .

     "Shyamji, you don't pay even half of the attention to me, as much you pay to  yourself." Anjali said with mocking anger.

          He,startled at the voice being unaware of the witness of his Heebie- jeebies. It was very unusual of him not to come up with an equal retort to Anjali. But today somehow it seemed a very odd day for every man of the family. Shyam answered as if talking to himself, "Anjali ,you were right. It's a difficult task to bring Arnav into our world."

   A concern took over her suddenly.She came close to him and asked worriedly ,"What happened,Shyamji? Has anything happened between you and Chote?"

  "I have failed to trace out Arnav." He answered sadly.

  "But Chote is in his room.Or did he again go out of reach? Wait I call him and scold. He has become..."

    

       Without letting Anjali to start her usual  list of chote's don'ts,Shyam spoke ,"I could not find Arnav in him ,Anjali! There is only The businessman Arnav Singh Riazada not Arnav." He let out a sigh and continued,

  "He is unable to understand any cardinal business.It's really difficult to make him experience those magical  words 'Love'. I have miserably failed in doing that."

  

    Anjali was overwhelmed experiencing her husband's concern for her Chote. Her lips curved into genuine smile.Holding his shoulders,she assured him,"Don't you worry Shyamji.We will do something, I will help you. If he is Arnav Singh Raizada then I too am Mrs. Anjali Singh Raizada Jha. I have the best of both the worlds from business as well as your law."

    

         And folding her hands to her chest she boasted ,"And I am the one best matchmaker ,you know? But before I help you with this matter ,you have to accept your defeat" She winked.

        Shyam let out a chuckle at her naughty wife.  "I was fighting an already lost battle, Rani sahiba" and he bowed down to her animatedly.

 The laughter of the duo could not reach to perturbed room of Arnav.

*********************************

    

         Aman and Arnav were discussing about Mr.Agarwal's deal in ASR's cabin. Arnav had studied it thoroughly and told Aman to make some changes. Aman nodded in agreement and said,

   "ASR, I'l make changes accordingly and soon give you the modified copy. I know we can seal this deal on your terms."

  

  "If only it could happen with every deal, Aman.."  Arnav spoke vaguely   staring in vacant.

 "ASR, Please pardon me."

 Arnav took a thoughtful pause before asking him,

  

"Do you believe in marriages , Aman?"

 "Yes I have a great faith in marriage system. And I am engaged."  The one thing Aman had not failed to learn from ASR in those many years is, not to let your inner thoughts speak with even an inch of muscle of your face... At least not in front of ASR. So even if he was surprised to the core for having this out of the blue discussion with ASR ,he simply did not show it.

  "Ohh, so when is the marriage?"

  

"Whenever you sanction my leave application."  He was acute with his answers.

    ASR smirked at this and asked cautiously,

 "So what did you make to choose that girl? Is she more suitable for you?"

 Now Aman could not control himself from letting out a sigh before answering.

  

 "I don't allow my brain to intervene into matters where I don't need to sign legally for my decisions, ASR! Rather I opt for my heart in those. I did the same thing here."  And he dared to do something which he had never done before ,not even in his dreams.

   "And if this was a sort of advise seeking then I would suggest you to do the same." 

  ASR confirmed, his decision of choosing Aman as his P.A was the most righteous one. Aman just knew what exactly he has to do at every time.

  "You may go,Aman" He said curtly.

     Aman collected all the papers and moved towards door. Before he went out, Arnav called him,

  "And Aman ,fix your marriage date this month. But make sure you manage some temporary arrangements for your role before going on a long vacation."

Aman showed his gratitude with a genuine smile and headed towards his cabin.

  

   

  As Aman left the cabin, Arnav swirled himself back on his leather chair. Holding hands back on nape ,lost in his old dreading memories.

    'Everybody,every damn body tells me to listen to my heart. But why? Why should I listen to that dumb organ who knows no logic. It is the reason of everyone's sorrows, pains. Ma used to listen to her heart always then what happened to her? She lost her life because she blindly trusted her heart. She never paid  any heed to the alarms her brain rang. What happened to Di, when she chose to marry that bas***d  Varun by listening to her heart? Her marriage was brutally broken. And...and the man who was called his father had immense faith in his brother. And what he did? He overtook all his business making his own brother's children orphan. His past was ruined because his family had opted their hearts over their brains...that bloody organ..'

       

        He picked the paper weight kept on table unable to control his anger towards every unfortunate thing happened in his past and threw it on the wall hoping at least that will pacify his bad temper.The poor paper weight shattered into hundreds of pieces with a thud and spread out on soft carpet of the floor. He glanced at all those throbbing pieces.His face was as usual deprived of any emotion but eyes'his eyes pouring out lava which was burning inside. Not that those broken pieces could cool him down but instead  every single piece brought a new piercing memory along.

      

    Akash had come to office to sign on some important papers before leaving for his honeymoon today. He was passing by Arnav's cabin when he heard the sound of something cracking. He thought over whether to peep in or not and making a decision,knocked on the cabin door.When his knock was not replied for a minute or so, he opened the door as a concern took over him. 

 Arnav was railing over his chair with  eyes closed. 

  "Bhai, what happened? Is everything okay?" He asked looking at all those  scattered glass pieces and entered carefully.

  

  "..."

  

 "Bhai?"  He raised his voice.

  

     Arnav opened his eyes and looking at his cousin's worried face , suddenly asked something which would be totally irrelevant to him,

 "Akash, why all people choose to trust their hearts over their brains while making decisions?"

    

  Akash was confused hearing his question. ASR was the least expected one to talk on issues related to heart nor he ever gives damn to what people do. As he understood that something has gone terribly wrong with his bhai he chose to answer the question instead of asking a reason behind it.

  

   "You know Bhai, Science teaches us that heart is nothing but an another organ made up of flesh and  its function is only to supply blood to our body. But in our lives we hardly remember those lessons because  what we experience is; it is made up of all kinds of emotions and feelings. It is one of the purest thing in human life  as it can't think  beyond noble emotions like love, trust or hopes. Any man needs the higher strength to follow his heart over brain. Because heart can't take any decision on selfish ground or calculate the possible risks of it like brain. So the one who follows his heart is the strongest one and not all but only brave people can trust their hearts while making decisions without thinking about their outcomes. Because brave are never afraid of results to their decisions."

     

    Akash had rarely seen his Bhai with such a lost and defeated look. So his brotherly concern made him ask,

  

"What's wrong ,Bhai? Has anything happened which I must know? If it's something serious I can just postpone my trip."

  

  Arnav suddenly caught his guards on as he realized that he is making Akash worried. He rose from his seat pulling his usual neutral mask on face and  greeted him,

   

  "You are getting late for your flight Akash. Wish you very happy honeymoon" He hugged him with pure warmth.

  

 "Yeah, thank you Bhai. Hope,I could wish you the same one day.."

   

 "Bye Akash!"  he freed his cousin from the embrace.Enjoying such rare emotional moments with his brother,Akash left the room still uncertain about what may have happened to his Bhai.

                                                  

                    

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